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[lsc@Eng.Sun.COM: from "The Realist"]
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To: yucks
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Subject: [lsc@Eng.Sun.COM: from "The Realist"]
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From: Gene Spafford <spaf>
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Date: Tue, 02 Oct 90 15:17:23 EST
The following contains some language that some people might find
objectionable. That is precisely why most of you will be interested
in it, I guess.
--spaf
------- Forwarded Message
Date: Tue, 02 Oct 90 13:13:45 -0700
From: lsc@Eng.Sun.COM
To: spaf, out-jokes@chryse.Eng.Sun.COM, in-jokes@chryse.Eng.Sun.COM,
jamle@chryse.Eng.Sun.COM
cc: lsc@Eng.Sun.COM
Subject: from "The Realist"
Sunday, on my usual library&bookstore&espresso fix trip, I picked up
a copy of "The Realist". I was interrupted at one point by someone who
wanted to know what I was reading and if he could have it when I was
done. I guess I was giggling too much. Here's a couple of selections:
from "Filler Items" in the "Media Freak" column:
. Membership in Mensa requires one to score in the top 2% of
the population on the standard I.Q. test. At their annual
convention, speakers ranged from Audrey Wegner, discussing
the aerodynamics of the bra, to Alan Vaughn, channeling
the spirit of a 13th century Chinese guru "who has learned
to speak English better over the years." The word _mensa_
is Latin for _table_--implying a center of philosophical
discussion--but in Spanish it's the feminine form of
_stupid_.
. New York State legislators have approved a bill which bans
dwarf-tossing and dwarf-bowling in bars and other businesses
that serve liquor.
An excerpt from the middle of Robert Anton Wilson's column
"Is Alan Cranston Full of Shit", dealing with the proposed
FCC ban on "indecent" speech on radio and tv, and the senator's
form response letter to one of Wilson's:
I suddenly remembered the immortal interview with musician
Bob Geldof published in the _Irish_Times_ when I was living
in Ireland. The reporter asked if his use of "improper
language" did not detract from the humanitarian causes
for which he has worked so hard and long.
"I don't know what the fuck improper language is," Geldof
replied. I only read this and wasn't at the interview,
but I've always been able to hear it, in my head, delivered
in his inner-city Dublin brogue: "I don't knah wot the fook
improper language is."
Then I recalled some remarks by the eminent philosopher
George Carlin (himself once the subject of FCC censorship).
Carlin, in his latest tour, has been doing a routine about
the three most dangerous groups in America. He says these
groups are: first, the stupid, who make up the majority.
(You all know how dumb the average guy is, right? Well,
mathematically, by definition, half of them are even dumber
than _that_.) Second, there is the group made up of people
who are full of shit, such as used car salespeople and
baseball stars (who will do a 30-second commercial endorsing
anything, including leper's dung for breakfast, if they get
paid a million dollars). Third, there is the vast army of
those who are totally fucking crazy. It is because of the
influence of these three groups, Carlin says, that we know
have a Vice President who is stupid, full of shit and totally
fucking crasy, all at once.
Heck, I'm subscribing. [It's too embarassing to be caught laughing
myself to death at the local bookstore/coffeehouse.]
The Realist, Box 1230, Venice, CA 90294
$23 for 12 issues, published quarterly
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